I think i have bipolar?

i believe i may have bipolar disorder, but i'm afraid to go to my gp, can i just carry on through my life pretending everything's okay when it isn't. I was suddenly on another wizzy 'high' last night, lasting for hours, i was agitated, highly exciteable, felt almost invincible, and my kids just said it was 'one of mum's crazy times', and then this morning i came down with a huge bang, couldn't stop crying, felt suicidal, this pattern drives me nuts, i can't talk to my hubby about it, he isn't someone i can talk to about anything really, he rejects me normally so i'm afraid that will get worse. i'm unsure whether i want medication as i don't want to be like a zombie, anyone got any other ideas as i'm not coping, but hiding the depression quite well, apart from the 'highs' which are impossible to. i've tried squashing that side when i feel it coming to avoid the lows that always follow, but it makes me very unhappy.